On difficult days with depression, even basic tasks can feel overwhelming. Getting out of bed, taking a shower, or answering a message feel much harder than other people may realize.

Self-care does not have to mean doing something elaborate. Sometimes it means choosing one small task to complete. Other times, it means resting, listening to music, spending time with a pet, or reaching out to someone who understands.

In conversations like this one on MyDepressionTeam, members have shared the strategies they use when depression makes the day feel especially hard. Their experiences show that there is no single right way to care for yourself, and what helps may change from one day to the next.

🗳️ What helps you most on difficult days?

Focusing on one small task

Getting extra rest

Doing something comforting or enjoyable

Connecting with someone

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When everything feels like too much, members often lower the goal. Instead of trying to finish an entire to-do list, they focus on one manageable step.

That step may be brushing your hair, eating breakfast, or changing clothes. For some people, small actions can create a sense of progress, even if that progress is limited to one part of the day.

”I set a small goal, one task, and focus on completing it. ... I often find, once I’ve begun, I complete what I start. And that small sense of accomplishment pushes me to do a little more.”

— A MyDepressionTeam member

One member described building momentum slowly: “I start small. I set a small goal, one task, and focus on completing it, one step at a time. It might be, run a brush through my hair, or have a quick shower and change out of my pyjamas, or make myself something basic for breakfast. I often find, once I’ve begun, I complete what I start. And that small sense of accomplishment pushes me to do a little more.”

When depression affects energy, sleep, and day-to-day functioning, basic hygiene can start to feel harder than usual. For some members, showering, getting dressed, or putting on comfortable clothes helps create a small shift in how the day feels.

“I take a shower and put makeup on. It makes me feel better about myself.”

— A MyDepressionTeam member

The goal does not have to be looking polished or productive. It can simply be helping your body feel cleaner, warmer, or more comfortable.

One member described how getting ready affected their mood: “I take a shower and put makeup on. It makes me feel better about myself.”

Another shared a comfort-focused routine around taking a hot shower: “Even if you don’t wash, stand or sit there for 10 or 15 minutes. Then, when you get out, slather your entire body with lotion. Then put on your most comfortable clothes.”

Depression can involve decreased energy, tiredness, and sleep changes, so several members said one of their most important lessons was to stop treating rest like a failure.

Rest may mean sleeping, lying on the couch, slowing down, or doing only what feels necessary. Members emphasized listening to their bodies instead of judging themselves for needing a break.

One member said, “Give yourself much needed downtime. Don’t limit your time. Take the time that YOU need.”

Another member spoke directly about guilt: “Sleep is often a good thing because bad and difficult days are exhausting. Body and brain need rest. … Don’t be guilty about sleeping.”

Some members use music, comedy, crafts, or other creative activities to make difficult thoughts feel less consuming. These activities may offer comfort, distraction, or a way to focus on something outside the depression. The best choice is often something familiar that does not require much planning.

One member described combining several forms of care: “I try to do stuff that I love to do. Which is listening to music, trying to rest, crafts, being with family or my fiancé.”

Another member found relief through humor: “I watch stand-up comedy!”

A third shared how art helped quiet racing thoughts: “I use my diamond art painting to calm my brain down from the racing thoughts I usually have.”

Some members said fresh air and movement help break up a difficult day. Others said even a short walk can feel like real work when depression is heavy.

That is worth acknowledging. Depression can affect motivation, energy, and interest in daily activities, so movement should not become another standard to judge yourself by.

“Get outside if possible. Nap, journal, read.”

— A MyDepressionTeam member

Another combined movement with music: “Enjoy walking around the park and listening to music.”

A walk does not have to be long. Standing by an open window, sitting outside, or walking to the end of the driveway may be enough.

Depression can sometimes come with loss of interest, low energy, and withdrawal from usual activities, yet many members said pets, family, friends, jobs, and support groups helped give their days structure.

Sometimes the need to feed a pet or show up for another person was what got them out of bed. In other cases, talking with someone supportive helped them feel less alone.

One member explained how their pets create a reason to get moving: “My dogs get me out of bed. Even if I want to hibernate, they need to be fed, watered, toileted, and cleaned up after.”

Another described the role of family and work: “Nothing actually motivates me, but knowing that I have to get up and on with my day for my kids and husband is what gets me going. There have been times when I don’t want to do anything but hide away (too many to count) but my job and family are the ones who have helped me exist.”

A third member pointed to the value of community: “Even the time we spend talking to one another on MyDepressionTeam is good for us!”

Support can take many forms. It might be texting a trusted person, sitting with a pet, attending a group, or telling someone that you are having a hard day. You do not have to explain everything to ask for company or help.