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I feel like i dont want to get better. Ive lived so long with my depression and anxiety who am i without it? My eating disorder...im terrified of giving that up and its so hard to even think about stopping that. i havent even talked to my shrinks about that
im used to being sick and its not that i enjoy having depressive episodes or anxiety attacks or the symptoms of ocd. I tried to talk to my therapist about it but he just pushed it aside so im not really sure i have ocd but when ive looked… read more
If you search for peace, and find it....you will notice that you have no use for the depression and anxiety. I hung onto mine for many years, fearful to release my identity. But the identity was so painful...it pushed me to go on a personal journey to seek peace. This was not easy WHATSOEVER. It came in little moments. But I took what I could get. Eventually I worked harder and the peace grew..now I she'd my personal label of depression, and have a new label...peace. I still get depressed...but it doesn't define who I am. Who I am is love...peace is love..and so forth. I like my new label. It feels good. I don't walk around thinking I'm a sick person all the time, and that there must be limits on what I can accomplish,...because sick people can only do so much. Today, if I can imagine it,...I can do it. Because I am peace.
It sure does, @A MyDepressionTeam Member, you just typed what i feel like all of the time! My husband once asked me, do you know who you are without your medications? I had to say no, but i know one thing, i cannot stop them, I will run right into a brick wall without them, i would meltdown. I think it's normal to feel "crazy", I have self doubt all of the time. Hugs to you, Kaye.
being diagnosed with OCD or not doesnt mean you cant have symptoms of it. If the thoughts are about food it may be linked to eating disorder. I have both but my eating disorder feels like a symptom of OCD if that makes sense.
I fully understand not wanting it gone.
Yes @A MyDepressionTeam Member & @A MyDepressionTeam Member.....it's what we become familiar with, unfortunately. The unfamiliar is extremely overwhelming to me most of the time.
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