My boyfriend has pulled away from me. Which causes me to have anxiety and insecurities. He then says my insecurities cause him to be pushed away. But then he doesn't realized(even when I tell him) his actions of ignoring me or pulling away causes my insecurities. I think he may realize now after a painful discussion yesterday.
I don't know if his meds have altered his mind where it's like the movie Liar Liar with Jim carrey where he has to tell the truth.… read more
Well, my boyfriend is reserved and stubborn at times. I just surprised him with a very nice, quality one that he couldn't resist. Now he journals. Hoping this helps for him.
Then I think the answer is time. Could he perhaps keep a journal? That really helps with anxiety and depression. Maybe his mind is clouded, not thinking straight.
I'm sorry to hear that 😞
My boyfriend's ex wife cheated on him and made him so insecure by belittling him regularly.
The thing is I know he loves me for me. Weight or not he truly loves me for me.
I think hes unhappy with himself, hes gained weight since we met and it's the heaviest hes ever been. While I joined the gym after his comment to get healthy for me.... I learned I've actually lost 11 pounds since April! And he and I have talked since his comments and it's more evident that he is not happy with himself. Hes dealing with so much with his ex wife, hes broke trying to deal with lawyers so he can get custody of his son. I think he doesn't want to be around me until hes more stable even though I could care less about money. I just want to go for a walk and talk and hold hands. And he knows that but hes got this I'm not man enough right now. Anx the absence is killing me. I know this will pass. His depression and anxiety is much worse than mine. I wish I could help him more. I wish he was able to see his therapist more. Or maybe he can see mine at some point. I miss us. I miss him. Even when hes down and even when he says things I know he doesn't mean, the way he looks at me. Eyes dont lie. It's pure love. I just need to help him ride out the storm. I think hes had too many give up on him and I don't want to be that person. I love that man through it all.
Very strange that he mentions your build. We all store at different places and you know, maybe he genuinely has feelings for you but he is 'in my opinion' is being very superficial and love has nothing to do with the way you look and where fat gets stored. I actually don't think that your weight or build has anything to do with anything. He is being superficial. What matters is on the inside, whether you are a good or not so good person, what goes on in your mind and heart.
As for the medication, maybe it's making him drowsy, but that shouldn't inhibit affection/sexual activities. Some antidepressants do however lower libido, so keep that in mind.
He is the one with the problem, at least he has made it clear what the problem is, but now you need to decide, are you going to be with a man who is as superficial as that, to only value you for your body, or a man who will treasure every deep and dark aspect of your mind, body and soul.
Maybe observe, see if he even notices that little spark in your eye. Take it from there.
*only my opinion and observation*