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How To Deal With Toxic Relative

How To Deal With Toxic Relative

Met my cousin yesterday as she often asks me to meet her and as usual she put me down and made critical remarks about my looks and appearance and other aspects of my life. I don't know why she does it - she's prettier than me, has a job and family and hasn't suffered from depression as far as I know. As usual I didn't respond to this at the time, just let it go, but after these meetings I'm so angry for days thinking what she said to me. I would never be deliberately hurtful to someone like… read more

A MyDepressionTeam Member said:

Tell her to go to hell, then do your best to pray for her(?) . . seriously, Angie, she needs help- she is spiritually sick, mi amiga . .

Love ya, kid . .

edited, originally posted about 3 years ago
A MyDepressionTeam Member said:

I know what it’s like when people treat you less then! Often it is to give them selves a boost but completely not acceptable! If you don’t feel like you can explain to her how it makes you feel in person you could send a text or some kind of message. She may even think she’s giving tough love to “snap you out of it” as some people think they can do with us that suffer depression but we all know that doesn’t work and makes us feel so much worse! Truth is if you can’t explain how you’re feeling or even have someone you trust explain to her how you feel then I would just avoid her. You don’t deserve this kind of treatment! I hope you can remember that you are an important person in this world and deserve all the best just as each of us do. I know that depression can make us think terrible thoughts and when someone else says mean things we believe it even more! But I know that we value your presence here and you deserve so much more then this person is treating you!
Sending hugs and best wishes 🤗❤️

posted about 3 years ago
A MyDepressionTeam Member said:

I have a freind sho has similar issues but its with her Mum. She has a great day and then goes to see her and ckmes home feeling depressed and upset. We talked it through and came up with a gradual removal of visits so she isnt subjecting herself to such negativity. And once she has visited she comes to mine and off loads so she isnf going home to deal with it alone. She always goes home with a smile and shd leaves me with one too. I really love her, she has been through so much and with little or no support from her family. She is always there for me as I am for her. Sometimes freunds are the family we choose for ourselves. And the other thing about someone else bringing you down, its usually when they are unhappy with their own lives. But this does not give them permission to be nasty to others. Perhaps turning it around and either repeating what rhey have said to you and askjng do you really mean tbis? And even if they say 'yes', then you have to ask them if they think its appropriate that they say it to you when your mood is so low. And if they say 'yes' to this, then you havevto be honest and tell them they are not being helpful to you and if they feel they cant be more diplomatic and caring of your feelings, then cut your visits. I dont recommend retaliation as this is just a negative response and wont acheive much, especially if its out of character for you. It'll leave you feeling as bad as ever.

posted about 3 years ago
A MyDepressionTeam Member said:

@A MyDepressionTeam Member. @A MyDepressionTeam Member. Thanx ladies.

Sadly we cannot choose our clan BUT thank goodness we can our friends, my friends are my support line & my adopted clan & i love them 2 bits.
Don't get me wrong if i go 2 stuff up my Irish Tarty Bestie will pull me in line LOL.

Take care & remember 2 be kind 2 urself.....ALWAZ!!!!

HOOROO & Toodles,
Mandy MOO 😊

posted about 3 years ago
A MyDepressionTeam Member said:

Giving someone who is nasty to you an ultimatum is not a good idea .. that just is like putting tape over their mouth ... they will only speak out all the more .. give yourself space - take the wind out of their sails ... then be nice but cautious .. .... hugs to all that are dealing with toxic people in their lives. Sandra

posted about 3 years ago
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