I feel like I'm suffocating in my feelings.
Outside there I have to wear this mask that makes me appear happier but alone I take off the mask.
Sometimes I just snap at people thats why I prefer to be alone.They don't know about this mental illness I have so I'd rather carry this burden alone.
I just do a lot of talking to myself. Nobody will understand even any of the doctors so I have quit going to them. The only place you have is on line in a group support like this one. Find some more groups on line for your issue.
Its important to get at least a percentage of advice from people who have similar backgrounds to you. Ill use myself as an example. I borrowed the audio book for misfit manifesto and got to hear a few people's stories in their voice, some of who i could directly relate to. Charlamagne has a book called black privilege which I thought was great. My examples may not apply to everyone, but you can use it as an idea to find what does apply to you.