All of my friends, every single one, is married, has children and grandchildren, yet at 62, I've never had that "family" connection. Dysfunctional family, married and divorced, with a son, and never remarried, at 21. Now at 62, my best friends and connections have had that "white picket fence" life. So, being that they are my best friends I am with them very often, all holidays, birthdays, etc. Ever feel like you're on the outside looking in? Ever ask why… read more
My friend please get the pet. I promise you it will be such a profound love for you! My best friends are my pets. I'm not trying to be funny here, it is the truth. So much love. I really don't think I would have made it through eveything that I have without them. Wondering about all the other stuff will work itself out. Trust me. My litter box is in the bathroom, for 4!! Not crazy about is but it works. Do it!! Keep me posted!
Oh, man, I was married at 20, separated & divorced 5 years later, he wasn't interested in a "marriage relationship" So no kids which I wanted. Then came from NM to AK with my younger sister in 1993 "for the summer" & I stayed. Lots of different jobs, then remarried a man 25 years older than myself after being friends for 10 years., you can imagine how that went, he passed away from cancer a year after we married. Things were horrible with his family. I've been (unfortunately jealous) for many years of people who have children & grandchildren etc. I've moved a lot to different states etc & wonder how my life would have been different with a "nice regular husband", kids, all that. I volunteer once a week at the city visitor center & many of the retired people who volunteer there are constantly talking about their kids/grandkids etc, plus of course I'm on disability & they all have good retirements or husbands with good retirements. Many of them travel a lot, all over the world. Big difference between myself & them. It can be strange. I'm 56 now, my parents passed at ages 57 & 58, I live in Ak, my brother lives in NE & my sister in Spain. Guess we chose where we live but it's pretty isolating. Outside looking in is right!
My animals have truly saved me, many times...do you have any? Just a thought. They give your lots of love and attention..I prefer them over people any day!! lol You have made a friend here. I appreciate your honesty and willingness to put stuff out there. If we don't put it out there, there is no point in this, right? You can ask me anything about "my history" and I will share. I'd like to think that's helpful for you, me and anyone else that happens to read it. Chat anytime. Have a great day. As James Taylor would sing, "You've Got A Friend"!
Hi KatShore, Thanks for the encouragement about getting a kitty. I'm thinking hard about it.
My lower back has been bad for the past 6 weeks, I normally have back pain mid-upper & cervical areas & headaches a lot but this lower back thing is pretty new. It normally hurts mildly but now it's crazy bad. Had X rays then an MRI & the results of the MRI I can't really decipher. I have to be able to walk, since I take a bus & have to walk to stops etc. The grocery store I go to is only 3 blocks from where I live each way which is normally great but had to go there yesterday & counted the number of times i had to stop to change positions & stop for a bit. 12 times in 3 blocks. It seems like it's getting worse.
Well, guess that's enough whining about that....:). Guess if I had a kitty I could talk to it & it would be a lot healthier than talking to myself!
Will write a little more later, really hungry now.....Take care!
Hi again, I tend to go off & on here, not every day although I mean to.....I've read that people who have animals actually live longer than people who don't have pets. That's pretty profound. I think about getting a kitty, I'd want a mid age one, there is a "no kill" cat shelter here, it's connected to a thrift store & they have cats in the back. If you adopt one they make sure it's spayed or neutered & stuff like that. You can also "foster" cats & they will provide food etc. I worry a lot about costs, I am on disability & live in a 1 bdrm & not a lot of $ or space. When I think about the actual business of keeping a pet it's kind of scary. like, what if it developed a bad illness & I couldn't afford the vet care, or even just the litter & food. And I don't know where to keep a litter box, the only place might be my bathroom but I hate litter boxes in the bathroom. I kind of over think stuff like that. Like I know there is pet insurance etc....But when I think about a creature giving unconditional love that's pretty powerful. My bldg does allow pets although I think there is an extra fee.
I don't know how to post a picture of myself here. Was hoping to somehow bring my FB pic here but that didn't work. I know I like seeing other people's pictures!
Having a hard time moodwise, my pcp is leaving the end of March, she has a much older sister who has an illness that's going to lead to death, she's going to leave Anchorage & move to Sacramento to help take care of her sister. I think that is just astounding. She's closing her practice & her husband is retired & they are moving until the end I guess. I know she doesn't really want to but she's doing it because she loves her sister. Can you imagine? She's the absolute best pcp I've EVER had. She has a policy of spending a full hour with her pts! She told me that when she was discussing going into practice with her husband they decided as long as she could break even she'd be fine with it. I've never ever heard of anything like that. Plus of course she takes medicare & medicaid. I have chronic pain / fibromyalgia & she is willing to prescribe opiates to me for the past 6-7 years I've seen her. I don't take high doses but am very stable on them & have taken the same amounts for many years. She's also going to try to match all her pts with other providers she thinks will be a good match. It's getting harder to find people who take medicare in Anchorage now. Now this won't send. Too many letters?