Being stuck with nothing to do but worry

I am in that place now where I am alone, and I feel I will die alone. I can't think of any man, for any reason that would want to take me on. I just want a good friend to do things with, no romantic stuff! Just to have fun, deep conversations, someone to hold me when I cry. Just to talk to, not expect anything from me, and to make sure I'm safe. I hate cooking, and I have too many mental and physical problems. I'm not good for anyone - only as a friend. I am isolated right now but even if I wasn't, I'm so tired of being rejected, so exhausted from being angry at the Universe, I just want a real friend who actually cares about me and will be there when I go.

There are so many of us freaks and geeks out here, you are not alone. When I was in a better place, I had to learn to love myself first even when nobody else did.

I still do, but it is buried for now.

Yes, I will likely die alone too.

What should I do until then is what I am thinking about?

I am not scared of dying, I am scared of not living.

Feeling abandoned, rejected, like freak, that I'm so messed up that no one could ever really love me in a relationship, so being alone and dying alone.

You and I should talk. I didn't know anyone else has that experience.