I try to find at least one thing that makes me happy about the holidays (Mom's plethora of Christmas treats, certain Christmas songs) and I try to focus that positive energy towards my day.

I think that I am more manic over the holidays then when they are over I am depressed.

As far as your ex trying to out do you, my mom was in your shoes. My Dad didn’t do it out of spite though, he just always had more than mom. I realized this as a kid. Don’t beat yourself up. Pretty young kids get this. Just do your best and they will understand.

Ignore the holidays send your cards and presents and engagements set earlier than the holiday. Replace the time with with volunteer services, pto, a regularly programmed television station or different type of therapy. Cheap Groupons for massages/dinner reservations/ or see an experience(Broadway theater plays ice skating). Exercise/diet/plenty of water should replace those ill dancing feelings. Tell ‘‘em get tha fuck out don’t spend any money on decorations save it.

Holidays are on the way ..
I went to a luncheon with members of a Peer Support group this week.
There were some that we haven't heard from for months .. and a few who were communicating via email .. so it was nice to see each other face to face.
Some were in the spirit ( smiles) ... more were voicing problems.
Christmas is not a good time for many of us.
Too much of "already" habits that are out of control - - self medicating with alcohol .. for example.
Too many sweets !
Sleeping cycles can get out of sync.
You have to be on best behaviour with people you are not "in love with" ... not even in like with .. lol.
So if you are smart .. make a plan .. or more than one plan.
Plan to go and either see the visit through OR ... give yourself an OUT.
Say you have plans to see some other friends .. and leave.
So now think - What you want to do .. how much .. or plan #2 .. #3 etc. etc.
Hugs, Big Hugs ...
Sandra

Maybe try making things simple as you can, do what you want and try to enjoy time with the kids. I know it can get overwhelming but hang in there. Sorry, I know lots of people say that.