Hi
Please do not hide your feelings etc. It builds up inside and will explode one day like an erupting volcano. It took many years for me to show I felt etc and when I became depressed it all came out. You can read my story on my bio page. Take Care

I desperately want people to realise just how depressed and struggling I am but i'll be damned if i'll admit how weak I am. So the best way is to throw myself into a jam packed routine that maintains the facade - work and social plans. I appear as highly functioning and the double life began.

It's unfortunate but most people don't care how your doing. They're so caught up in their own lives and problems.

Yes. My depression worsened when I hit puberty and through my teen years, which is when I was at my least functional. I'm doing pretty well now, but I've accepted the inevitability that my depression will be with me for life. The only problem with that is, sometimes people misunderstand good periods and think you're 'cured' or, worse, over-exaggerating the whole time. That does bother me sometimes, but I learned that it's my own opinion that matters more than anyone else's. I don't hide my depression or the fact that I'm medicated, but I don't go shouting it from the rooftops either.
The only real precaution I take is I don't tell potential employers about my depression during the interview stage, but I do once I've signed a contract. There is still workplace prejudice and I've noticed I do better getting jobs when I don't tell the employer about the depression, but it's important to tell them early on in the employment because then you get all the legal protection you need during the dark periods. Anyone who is diagnosed with persistent and biological depression knows, you will go through dark times. And you need that safety net when it happens.

Thank you Erol