They may know that you are unwell and maybe waiting for you to open up to them. Also, someone in your family may also be depressed and like you they're hiding it as they think everyone else is strong and they're not. Having a depressive illness does not make you weak.! I think people with a mental health illness are incredibly strong but t we don't actually realise it xx

I can identity with what you are going through.Being a male and a baby boomer we were told we needed to pull up our socks and stop feeling sorry for ourselves. The idea that you are weak when you ask for help is totally false. Your family loves you but they will need to be educated on what depression and bi-polar is and that occurs when you start to get help for yourself. Its interesting that you mentioned that your mother never cried after her husband died. Your mom needs to grieve though she probably thinks by not showing her emotion is helping the family, its the total opposite. I am very happy that you have your boyfriend to confide in.

I would have your boyfriend on standby. Ask for a family meeting after dinner. You are very brave and tell them let them ask questions , have flyers and stuff they they can read. Maybe a few books. Good look

I can relate to what you are saying. I too come from a family that appears strong and in control all the time. That was how I grew up and how I've lived the first 50 years of my life. The last 5 years have shown me a lot about needing help and asking for it. 5 years ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer and went through a year of chemotherapy, radiation and a mastectomy. My family was there for me 110% and I never gave in to my fears and sadness I put on a brave and happy face and made it through. Now five years later and my young daughter is self harming and I am having the fears and sadness that I repressed a long time ago. What I've learned is that we all put on a strong face sometimes to make it through the tough times but it is ok to let it go and share your grief and fears and sadness with others especially those who are putting on a brave face too; it gives them their own opportunity to let go and share. It is so important to share, I guarantee you will feel much better for it.
Good luck.

hey that sounds tough i think ur amazing going thru this with no family support. i think if u struggle bringing ir up make u could write down what and how u want to tell ur family and mayby just start with 1 family member and c how it goes or even write it all down in a letter amd give it to them. My family is the same about sweeping things under the rug and ignoring or not talking about stuff but im the opposite and is very open .Good luck with everything