My partner seems to struggle to comprehend the illness, doesn't understand how crippling it can be, and isn't always supportive. How are your partners? How can I help him to understand? Thanks in advance for your help
Hello Samantha, He doesn't have to understand but he does need to be supportive! My parents have said they can't understand completely what I am battling daily but are always supportive! No love ones want to see another one suffer so much! I have often wished I had broken arms and legs instead of severe depression and anxiety! Broken bones heal in a faster time! Sending positive thoughts!
Have you thought about taking him to a therapist with you? A therapist or psychiatrist can educate him on your illness, how debilitating it is, & that you can't control your feelings. They will also explain how this is a very real illness, like cancer, & must be treated as such. He will understand that he is not necessarily to blame, & he will learn ways to help support you when you are having a bad time. Just a thought..
Honestly, I broke up with him.
After trying and giving him information, so on and so forth. I decided he didn't want to learn...and I didnt need someone in my life making it harder for me in my recovery.
I only want people in my life that love me for ME. That understand ME...that want to be there and be supportive.
This is YOUR life and you have to make choices that are about YOU. It's not being selfish it's being healthly!
See if there's a NAMI group meeting in your area. They often do groups for couples to go. It might be a great thing to bring him to. You'll get some support from people who understand what you're going through; and your partner will get some feedback from the people who are there to support their loved ones.
I started by showing her the Black Dog video a few years ago but it wasn't until I actually talked to her like the friend she is and not just my wife that she began to understand. It took a few years to be fair, but I wasn't being very open or honest about my mood. It's still not easy for her and she tries but it does worry me that one day she'll just tell me to $%^& off!
Honestly, things improved when I made myself realise that should I ever want to be on my own, then I can be. I'm in her life because **I** want to be there, not because I **have** to be there! Like @A MyDepressionTeam Member said, you don't need a hindrance to your recovery