How Do You Deal With Failure? | MyDepressionTeam

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How Do You Deal With Failure?
A MyDepressionTeam Member asked a question πŸ’­

This is probably one of the worse things that I can ever experience in my life, if someone tells me what a failure I am and how I can't do anything right...well they don't usually say it in those words, but that's at least how my mind picks up hints from how people are talking to me. I know I'm not perfect. Nobody is perfect. But sometimes I feel like I'm the worst of the worst. I feel dumb, that I'm not worth anything.

How I deal with my failures basically, is planning a way out, so I can… read more

posted September 6, 2019
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A MyDepressionTeam Member

Three ways I deal with failure: 1. Remove the word from my vocabulary and internal dialogue. Failure has such a negative connotation that it can serve no positive purpose in my life, mentally or otherwise. It's hard at first, but eventually i was able to change my belief about "failure" existing altogether. 2. Shift my perspective to treat "failures" as positive learning experiences. "I'm not failing, I've been given an opportunity to learn something".3. Focus NONE of my social energies on people who will treat me poorly, or bring me down. I don't usually need any help from anyone when it comes to making me feel like a failure. My brain automatically speaks to me negatively enough, I can't afford to invest any time or energy in anyone who is going to make that worse by speaking to me or treating me with anything but respect, love, and positivity. I don't think you're a failure, at all! I'm glad you're here to help me with my recovery, and feel free to reach out anytime if you need someone

posted September 6, 2019
A MyDepressionTeam Member

That's a good question. I don't get told I'm failing but my history and actions tell me otherwise. My self esteem is at an all time low and depression has numbed me. For me, each failure is just another nail in my already sealed coffin. They don't seem to matter anymore which should be cause for concern. You are still young and have a future whereas I am in my future and dont care too much as to what others think. I am what I am.
In your case I would question peoples comments ans see if they are valid. Without much ado I would try improve where I can or change. A skinny little man is never going to be a successful Marine. He must change and become and excell in what he is capable of. A nerd computer programmer or whatever. Then he stands a chance of success. Like me, maybe you are not destined to be in the top ranks of anything. Just mediocre. So what. ENJOY what you do and live life. Dont waste it (timewise). Other persons opinions are not your problems. We all are different and unique. Embrace your uniqueness. Thats who you are. Self acceptance and you are 90% over the obstacle. Huggs

posted September 6, 2019
A MyDepressionTeam Member

Hi Estine. I feel the same. Now that doesn't help at all, does it?

Just remember that you are unique and there are things that you do that no one else can. Your approach to situations is different to the next person but doesn't mean that you are a failure.

posted September 11, 2019
A MyDepressionTeam Member

I do too. Be patient with yourself.

posted September 28, 2019
A MyDepressionTeam Member

@A MyDepressionTeam Member I actually also have the memory loss thing which also makes me look and feel pretty stupid!

posted September 28, 2019

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